Permission to romanticize the plans
(Or not.)
Hi! I hope you’ve had a slow and restorative holiday season and an invigorating start to 2025. I’ve had both and neither. More on that below.
Permission slip
After a long and stressful year, my partner and I planned a trip to Moab just after Christmas—the only one we would take with each other and our two-year-old all year (unless you count a weekend to Bear Lake with friends during which our cars got stuck in the snow and I went skiing alone; or a camping trip, also with friends; both were fun but weren’t a just us trip.) We had a perfect Christmas morning and that afternoon, the toddler woke up with a cough that led to a steroid from the pediatrician the next day and the 5 hour roadtrip from hell the day after that as we made our way to our “vacation” to “reward” ourselves for making it through a hard year.
As a recovering perfectionist and, I guess, a Pisces, I get a lot of ideas in my head about how idyllic something will be while I’m planning it. When I envisioned our Moab trip, I saw us frolicking on empty trails in the national parks, reading in the warm sun on the deck of the Airbnb while the toddler napped, and drinking wine on a restaurant patio in the evenings, cheers-ing to our worries finally being behind us. Of course in the real world, the toddler was sick, Moab was cold and crowded, and I’ve never seen my husband read outside on a deck regardless.
My expectations for a new year often get on a similar upward spiral. I’m not big on setting resolutions or trying to become a better or more productive person based on an arbitrary date but I do love having a new time period to organize my plans around. Spend 1,000 hours outside, go on 6 camping trips, read 65 books—all things I put on my 2025 bingo card this past weekend. I promptly pasted it into my new 2025 journal that I plan to write in every single day as I slowly mark off every single box on that bingo card.
In fact, I can see myself now on the sixth camping trip, reading my 65th book by the fire as my hours outside reach exactly 1,000. No one has gotten sick, life hasn’t thrown any curveballs, I’ve never felt burnt out. I’m in my own little bubble and I’m doing it all. The perfect year in which everything is within my control.
Of course, I know what I really need on my bingo card is a box labeled “don’t get bingo.” A little reminder that I don’t have to do it all, that often the best moments happen when things don’t go as planned or when we decide to scrap the plans all together. Like when my sick toddler falls asleep against my chest in the carrier on the hike, something he hasn’t done in over a year and that I thought might never happen again. Or when we decide to stay in and bake cookies and watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse instead of forcing another cold hour outside onto our total.
We still frolicked on some hikes in the desert. I read my book from the couch inside the Airbnb with my dog curled around my legs. We cheers-ed with chai-tinis over arguably the best Vietnamese food I’ve had in a while. The plans were a little broken but the memories were not.
Happy 2025. I’ll see you in at least—*checks bingo card*—12 newsletters this year. (Already killing it.)
Things to watch, read, and do
To read: I read an advanced e-copy of Adrienne Young’s new mystery/thriller (comes out today!) and I loved it. Very atmospheric and riveting, perfect for this time of year.
To watch: If you haven’t seen the new season of Queer Eye, truly, what are you doing? Jeremiah is everything and I honestly think it’s the best set of episodes yet.
To watch: My toddler can finally mostly sit through a whole movie and we’ve been making our way though classic Pixar films. Monsters, Inc made me bawl this weekend. I forgot how much I love it.
To do: If you have a zoo near you, may I suggest a winter visit? We went this weekend and when we arrived at opening (10:00 AM!) there were about eight cars in the parking lot. It was divine. And really, not even that cold, even with snow on the ground.
To read (or listen to): I finished Ina Garten’s memoir on Christmas Eve and it was delightful. She reads the audiobook herself and as someone who was really not that familiar with her background, I found it charming and inspiring.
Currently reading: Cleopatra and Frankenstein by Coco Mellors. You may recall that her book Blue Sisters was my favorite of 2024 and I needed more of her writing in my life. I would like to live inside her brain for a while—it seems like a beautiful place.
To make: I borrowed one of Christina Tosi’s cookbooks from the library and got all the ingredients to make these Ritz cracker cookies but haven’t made them yet. I guess since the recipe is online I can return the cookbook…
To read: My book club’s January pick is this literary thriller and I can’t wait to get started. I read Angie Kim’s other book in 2023 and it was one of my favorites of the year.
To make: Despite my tongue-in-cheek thoughts about journaling above and in the past, I’ve been loving my daily journaling practice (for the last six days lol). Highly recommend going down a TikTok rabbit hole to see if it piques your interest.
What are some of the things you’re planning to do (or fail at doing) in 2025? Lmk if you want a body double or an excuse to scrap the plans and chai-tinis—down for both.